That one comment—from a local colleague 15 years ago—changed how I approach leadership across cultures.
Despite holding a managerial role, I was being addressed too casually, sometimes even dismissed by local stakeholders in an Asian country near the equator.
The problem wasn’t my competence. It was my appearance.
⚫️ The Lesson I Learned the Hard Way
At the time, I thought I was being practical: short-sleeved shirts, no tie—Japanese Cool Biz style. Perfect for the equatorial heat, right?
Wrong.
I was in my mid-30s with no gray hair, no beard, and constantly sweating in meetings. To local staff and partners, I simply didn’t look like someone with decision-making authority.
When I mentioned the casual treatment to a colleague, his response reframed everything:
“Mr. Okabe, you look too young!”
It wasn’t about respect for me as a person. It was about how I was visually positioned in their mental hierarchy.
In many cultures—especially in emerging and developing markets where I’ve spent the past 20 years across seven countries—people instinctively assess where you stand based on appearance:
→ Your age
→ Your position in the organization
→ The level of authority you might have
All inferred before a single word is spoken.
⚫️ What I Do Differently Now
Since that experience, I give context-specific advice to colleagues visiting from Japan, especially those with decision-making authority.
For many cultures where hierarchy and authority are visually assessed—common across various emerging markets I’ve worked in—my recommendation is clear:
“Please wear a long-sleeved shirt and a jacket.”
But this isn’t universal. My current workplace, for instance, is the complete opposite. Senior leaders regularly attend meetings in casual attire, and nobody makes assumptions based on appearance.
The real skill isn’t following one rule—it’s reading the cultural context you’re entering.
Yes, in tropical countries where the weather is never “cool”—only hot or hotter—the jacket advice is rarely welcomed.
But here’s why it matters in the right context:
When someone is unconsciously perceived as “lower status,” they’re more likely to be underestimated or treated dismissively. And that slows down conversations that should move forward smoothly.
⚫️ The Uncomfortable Truth About Stereotypes
I’ll be honest: I make these same snap judgments.
My brain has been trained through experience to associate:
– Suits and jackets with seniority
– Gray hair with authority
When someone doesn’t fit these expectations, something feels “off” to me—even though I know better intellectually.
Stereotypes—whether ours or others’—don’t change overnight.
So instead of fighting them head-on, I learned to work with them strategically. By temporarily aligning yourself with what a “manager” or “leader” is expected to look like in that context, you create the space to actually lead.
⚫️ Perception Creates Reality
This isn’t about changing who you are. It’s about recognizing that leadership sometimes requires adapting how you’re perceived—so your ideas can be heard, your decisions respected, and your influence felt.
That’s a lesson I learned wearing a suit and tie in countries where people joke that the only seasons are “hot” and “hotter.”
What’s been your experience working across cultures? Have you had to adapt in unexpected ways?
I’d love to hear your stories in the comments.
“Mr. Okabe, You Look Too Young to Be a Manager”
